A 91-year-old lesbian is America’s only remaining princess.

Move over, Britain, with your fancy royals and their tabloid-worthy scandals.

America has a princess, and she’s a multimillionaire nonagenarian Hawaiian lesbian with an unpronounceable name, a stable of racehorses, a new wife and an angry lawyer.

Meet Abigail Kinoiki Kekaulike Kawananakoa.